Joy belongs in the Resistance PERIOD
It’s dark and scary but Joy has its part in the resistance. It’s not spiritual bypassing nor toxic positivity. If you can’t find joy in life, that’s understandable but accept the joy that finds you.
There is a divide rippling out it’s not just the white supremacist against the marginalized communities. (yes, that is happening too) Friendly fire is being shot out by allies who think people aren’t “doing enough” to stop oppression.
Are there people who are ignorant of what’s really happening? Yes, and… they are more likely the ones that voted for this.
Sidenote: I rabbit holed HARD on this, and it came out longer than I wanted but, hang in there, there is a point to my rumblings….
There’s so much chaos happening and it’s by design. Many people are fighting unseen battles. They are trying their best to survive the minute-by-minute chaos. Some people are facing homelessness, health crises, overwhelming debt, as well as deportation, hate crimes, and rights being stripped away.
This is all BY DESIGN. They want us tail spinning and divided to fight individual fires instead of coming together. They want us to be in fear, hate, stress, and anxiety. *Which we have a right to be in, its effing scary out here.
If someone steps up and say “NO, I’m keeping my peace, my joy, my love, and my kindness.”
It does not mean that they are turning a blind eye to the reality around them. They know what’s behind the door and they know what’s happening. What they are doing is refusing to be controlled by it.
People who choose their peace and joy have a wide range of emotions every hour and every minute. The difference is that they aren’t allowing their wild emotions to control their actions.
They are asking themselves, “What do I do with or what can I do now with all these feelings? What are these feelings asking me to do? What is in my control?”
For me choosing joy looks like going out of my way to have a conversation with queer people in public. Showing them, they are seen and are not alone. My joy looks like sending prayers of Light and Love to anyone that needs a little more support. My joy allows me to hold space for others and to hear what they are going through.
Joy is saying hello to a stranger with a smile or asking them how their day is going. My joy ripples from me when I point out the beauty in the creators, the plants, the trees, rocks, winds, waters, and the sky.
These are all acts of love, kindness and joy. They’re not over the top nor fake. They’re small acts of Light in this dark world. *Light seeds for someone to bloom within.
Choose Your Battles
I’ll change or walk away from topics of conversation that are going to create more hate and suffering for myself or those involved. It’s not about ignoring or turning a blind eye to the topic, it’s about choosing my battles.
We’re not going to be able to change the mind of an ignorant jack*ss that refuses to see anything but the tip of their nose. *And Trump’s brown hole.
Plus, who are they? Do they really matter? Will it make a difference? Or are they a bored old white person with nothing better to do?
They won’t convert me to their hate, so why in the world am I going to feed more fuel to their fire? When they like to be a toxic trash pile.
My father a shining example of a Trump brown noser clearly illuminated this fact to me. We’d get into epic screaming matches over the phone over human rights and equality. Eventually, I started hanging up on him, he’d tried to call back, but I refused to answer.
After one of our battles, I calmly stated, “I do not like these screaming matches. It’s not solving anything. This is not love and it hurts me, I’d rather just never speak you again.”
His response, “I love it when we fight. I thought we were having fun.”
BLEW MY MIND.
He thought we were having fun. Belittling the wisdom of his child to the point of screaming matches is what he thought was fun and love?
When he realized this wasn’t what I thought love was he stopped, until the youth anti-trans laws in Idaho.
I’d just sat through the hearing of the bill ending youth gender affirming care in Idaho. He was on his Fox News BS, so I asked him if he wanted to know the truth of gender affirming care.
He said yes, (I only realize now he just wanted to put me in my place with his hate.) but in the midst of my detailed facts about the topic he started screaming over me. *in my best customer service voice “I wish you luck with Trump.” I hung up and I haven’t answered his calls since.
This was over two years ago. I refuse to play his game, especially now. He is never going to listen to facts, he just wants to fight. AND he wants to scare me to his side. *Hell, yes, I’m “woke” by their definitions.
I don’t care what side of the aisle you're on. Spewing fear and hate at me won’t make me obedient nor hateful and scared. It makes me rebel against hate with kindness. At the same time filling me with some joy as I watch them stumble trying to make me play their game.
See, these people WANT US to play their game. They are miserable, sad, and angry. Misery loves company and they want us to be that company. They don’t even care if we’re miserable about the same things, just that we are miserable too.
I’d rather spend my time and energy finding like-minded individuals, aware of what’s happening, and doing the best they can with the tools they have.
Respect Community
Being enraged at other allies for not “doing enough” and placing your fear, hate and anxiety into them because they are choosing alternative way, is not helping. It’s adding to the chaos that flying around.
The judgment needs to stop.
It’s going to create more of a barrier between allies. Each side will start to feel as if they’re being belittled and fighting this war alone. Making both parties feel unseen and alone. *shrugs* IDK maybe active listening and really hearing what each person is saying, would be brilliant right now.
I could be enraged at those that decided not to vote, because they decided it didn’t matter because both options were corrupt, but I’m not. I respect their choice. They did what they thought was the best at that time.
Do I think that Kamala was the perfect choice? NOPE. Do I think it would have solved everything? NOPE. In fact, we may have been faced with a hustle takeover to rival Jan 6th had she won. We’ll never know, but we are here now.
Hate, fear and rage won’t solve this fight. Those tactics are what the people in power use to control others. *hell it’s how we got here.
They cried out “but the children” and without much thought people jumped. They cried “immigrants are taking your jobs” again without much thought people jumped.
This fight has been building for decades (and centuries). It isn’t going to be over quickly. *Even though I wish it magically would.
Protesting, contacting representatives, and flooding tip lines is a great way to slow down what’s happening. Assassinating a CEO here or blowing up a cyber-truck there makes headlines, but they don’t cut out the major issues. As Hercules discovered, cutting of the head of Hydra only creates more heads.
We must look at all the options and possibilities to come up with different answers. Because what has worked in past is no longer working.
Over the numerous real talks, I’ve had with myself and others within my different communities, I’ve uncovered something isn’t spoken of enough:
Everyone has their own role in this fight.
Everyone has a part to play based on their skills, training, strength, and wisdom.
Now is the time to figure out what that means to you as an individual. What tools do you have for this fight? It may look and handle differently than someone else’s tool. And that’s a plus!
Or perhaps you don’t have the strength to pick up a tool right now. That’s fine too. You’re allowed to rest and regain your strength before running into the battle.
Regardless of how it looks on the outside, no one is fighting this battle alone. The powers at be want us to feel as if we are, it’s part of their design.
We have a responsibility to each other to respect each other’s choices in this battle. To rally around each other and say, “we’re in this together!”
There are allies out there struggling to figure out where to go and where is safe, because of the great divide.
We need to call them in and give them a place to land. Sometimes that’s joyous open arms, (thinking of the way Mrs. Welsey’s always welcomed everyone to her home) saying “We are here! You belong and are safe here, regardless of the shape you’re in.”
Coming together with a common goal means respecting all role in this battle. We may never even know the full role everyone plays.
Thinking of Gandolf disappearing and returning in LOTR. He didn’t care what the others thought, he knew what needed to be done and did it.
There will be some that aren’t meant for the picket lines, or jail, or hand to hand combat. Not because they are too weak and can’t handle the fight. And it’s not because they are turning a blind eye while allowing oppression to win.
It’s because it’s not their role.
We need fighters, healers, inspirers, moral lifters, leaders, story tellers, reporters, artists, and dreamers and more.
Weaves of Joy
We need a community of differently skilled individuals to come in as waves against the oppression.
Waves of fighters, cutting down the path of the oppressors. Waves of fixers cleaning that path. Weaves of dreamers with directions for rebuilding. Waves of builders to rebuild.
Weaves of medics offering safe places for our injured and weak to recover. Weaves of record keepers telling the stories and wisdom that will live on. Waves of mortal lifters to keep the flame of justice burning.
Waves of joy, light, love, kindness to keep us from becoming the darkness we are fighting.
Joy is the opposite of misery. It allows for more light in the soul. Joy offers us space to find peace amongst the chaos. These little moments of peace allow us to pause where we can think and see more clearly.
We can also find joy in the fight by being in the right role because it sparks passion within us, whether that’s fighting, picketing, dreaming, or building. The more joy we have in our role, the more effective we can be.
Personally, I find more joy in being safe space, love and joy, and a voice for others when they need one, then I find in fighting. Even though I can (and if necessary, will) fight.
Still, it can be incredibly hard to create joy in dark times due to the struggles and continued blows by the oppression. Know that you don’t always have to be the one that’s creating or finding joy.
Sometimes, you must allow joy to find you and not push it away just because times are dark. It’s about allowing joy to wrap you in a blanket of comfort. Even if it’s only for a moment.
Allowing yourself to en-JOY the moments that are being offered:
when your favorite song comes on and you start dancing along
when the first sip of coffee hits right
when your food tastes orgasmic
when the air is fresh with rain
when you watch a sunset or sunrise
when you bathe under the stars
when the birds sing
when you see a rainbow
when the book, show, or movie is funny
when you create something with your hands, gardens, writing, painting, etc.
when children are laughing and just being kids
when your animals are acting a fool or being adorable
when you’re sitting with a friend or family, maybe even laughing with them
when you play a game or sport
when you’re snuggling your partner
It's these simple joys that find you and that you’re allowed to enjoy, regardless of the chaos swirling. These joys keep the Light in your soul. Reminding you why you are fighting: for peace, for justice, for the future, and for everyone to have the right of these joys.
In the beginning, there was Light. That Light became Love. Then that Love became Joy. That Joy, Love, and Light, is what we are all fighting to return too.
If you want to share some joy with me… a cup of tea always brings a smile to my face. - thank you!
A few dark times when joy was allowed for just a moment.
*For months these have swirled in my mind.
While Ann Franks Family was in hiding, they found moments to dance and celebrate. I can’t remember when or why but they allowed those moments as long as they could. *Forgive me if this is wrong but I see it clearly in my mind.
When Frodo and Sam were close to the gates of Modor. Sam started recalling his favorite times in the Shire. How the strawberries would be blooming. Then they both started making up the stories that future generations would create about them. For a moment they smiled.
When Harry and Harmione started dancing in the tent to a song that came on the radio. Just for a moment, laughing and forgetting the troubles they were facing.
Share a time in a book, movie, history, or your personal life where joy replaced the burdens, even if it was just for a moment.
